The photo of adorable Gallifrey is here to keep things in perspective. My life and relationships now are stronger than ever. I’m happy. I have a husband and cats that love me. It’s all good. But let’s talk about that one time I was in that shitty relationship shall we?
There are so many things I wish I could go back and tell myself about that craptastic relationship in college. But I don’t actually regret it. Sure I definitely wouldn’t repeat it, but I learned a lot about myself, my worth, and the love I deserved. If time travel becomes a thing, I have a few things I’d tell myself (besides ‘end it’ of course).
Words and actions aren’t the same thing. Just because they say one thing, doesn’t mean it’s true.
Being in a bad relationship is more lonely than being alone. There’s so much doubt and distrust in an unhealthy relationship that you spend more time wondering and worrying what they’re up to than anything else. I felt constantly paranoid (and for good reason because he was definitely cheating on me) and unsure of myself. I felt crazy, jealous, and alone.
If it’s work, it’s not worth it. A relationship shouldn’t beat you up mentally. It should make you feel like you’ve found something that’s been missing. That you’ve found a missing piece of yourself that you didn’t know you needed. It shouldn’t hurt. It shouldn’t be soul-crushing.
Leave the self doubt behind when you leave him behind. It took me way too long to regain the self-confidence I lost in that shitty relationship. I felt worthless, not sexy enough, not funny enough. Just not enough. My self worth got wrapped up and twisted into making him like me that I didn’t even care if I liked myself.
I am the accumulation of all of my past experiences. That shitty relationship gave me what I needed to become a person I wanted to be. I learned to say ‘no’ and to fight for myself. It wasn’t easy, and it didn’t happen overnight, but I took how terrible I felt those brief months in that relationship and put it on the never-again list. I hope none of you experience a shitty relationship, but if you find yourself in one, have the courage to take yourself out of it sooner rather than later. You deserve better.
You deserve better.
(Also I sincerely hope that shitty guy reads this post…just sayin’)
From Google calendars to notebooks, I’ve tried quite a few ways over the years to keep track of my online content. Since blog posts and videos often change based on my mood and what’s relevant, I need a system that can adapt and change with me. Of course Google Calendar is great for that, but I much rather use stickers. I mean…who wouldn’t?
So lately I’ve been operating on a two monthly calendar system. I created my own frankenplanner with two monthly calendars back to back. The first is my main calendar to track travel and appointments, and the second is for content. That way I have everything in one place, but separate to keep things from getting too messy.
I stick with functional stickers and use the boxes with the white insides for blog posts and the shaded ones for videos. I put all of the stickers down at the start of the month and fill in posts and videos as I go along. Having all of the stickers down at the start of the month makes it easy for me to see where and when I need content. It also helps me coordinate blog posts to go along with videos. I use rectangle boxes to mark any travel or big events that will likely affect content.
If I decide to change up a post or a video after writing something down, I place another sticker on top of it. Sure I could use erasable pens or remove the sticker, but I find putting one on top of the other is the fastest and laziest approach.
I’m sure my system will continue to change and adapt depending on my needs, but this method combines my love of stickers and desire to use a tangible planner into one happy solution.
As far as daily planners go, the Day Designer has to be my favorite. It’s my go-to planner when I’m feeling particularly overwhelmed with my schedule, have a lot of meetings, and don’t want to overbook myself. It’s gorgeous, heavy-duty, and has tons of space for to do lists and appointments.
Since I use the Erin Condren Deluxe Monthly as my main planner, I decided to keep the monthly view simple in this one. Some Mildlinersto mark appointments and travel did the trick. That way I can quickly glance at the monthly view if necessary to see any big events or plans while working on my daily pages.
This ruler trick is one of my favorite new discoveries. Place a sticky note on the ruler to track a list throughout the entire week. Presto. Planner magic.
The daily views have a timed section to write down meetings and scheduled events, plus a to do list area. The top section has places to write due and don’t forget items as well as the day’s top three.
The weekend’s are on one page with a next week view at the bottom. This is super helpful to know what’s coming up the following week that I can prepare for over the weekend.
The Day Designer is an amazing planner if you’re quite busy and your day to day changes often. There’s plenty of space to write to do lists, plan big projects, and schedule appointments. It has been a savior for me this past month.
Hear more about the planner as well as enter the giveaway to win one for yourself in the above video.
Now of course I wish to do lists contained only important items like “pet puppies” and “eat ice cream,” but alas they do not. But in order to get to those two happiness boosting activities, we have to get all of the “meh” things out of the way. Here’s how to make a to do list like a boss so you can get on to the things you rather be doing.
Keep it realistic. Your to do list needs to be realistic above everything else. You know how much time you have in the day to actually complete things on the list. Keeping your list realistic makes you feel more accomplished when you check things off rather than disheartened when you barely make a dent.
Limit the list to three top priorities and around six other items. This helps with keeping the list realistic. Have three things that HAVE to get done that day, and around six other action items that you’d like to complete as well. That way you aren’t trying to eat the whole elephant so to speak and are taking it one bite at a time.
Don’t micromanage yourself. Putting every step in the process may seem like a good idea, but you don’t want to micromanage yourself. You know everything that goes into say, writing a blog post. You don’t need to list each step along the way (take the photo, write the post, publish, share on social, etc), but can say “Blog Post” on the list instead. It’ll keep your list visually manageable despite there actually being a few smaller steps for each item.
Take steps towards your bigger goals. If you have quarterly goals or bigger things you want to accomplish, try and put one thing on your list every day or every other day to help you work towards those goals. That way you’re getting closer to the finish line without feeling rushed or overwhelmed at the scale of the project.
Cross things out. It feels oh so good to take a big line through a to do list item. That’s while I’ll never switch to digital to do lists. It’s too dang satisfying to cross things off.
Transfer unfinished items from one day to the next. If you don’t have as productive a day as you thought you would, don’t sweat it. Transfer unfinished to do list items to the next day’s list. That way you don’t forget something that still needs to get done. Be kind to yourself. You aren’t going to finish every single to do list every single day.
Of course if it helps you stay productive, add fun colors, stickers, and anything else to keep that list top of mind.
Ah Mondays. They get a bad rep. Mostly because we don’t prepare over the weekend to make sure it starts off on the right foot. If you’re looking to have the most productive week yet, here are 10 quick things you can do to set yourself up for success.
Create a to do list the night before Monday. That way when you’ve dragged yourself into work the next morning, you know exactly what you need to do rather than messing about on Facebook for a few hours before finally settling down to work.
Prepare meals for breakfast and lunch so you’re making healthier choices than a late afternoon trip to the vending machine. Having them pre-made makes it easy to just grab from the fridge and go in the morning too. Basically, do all the thinking the night before so you don’t have to worry about anything bright and early Monday morning.
Finish your laundry. I can’t tell you how many times I get halfway through the week and run out of underwear. Finish your laundry over the weekend so you aren’t having to do it during the week when you’re swamped with spontaneous events and nights out. Plus you’ll have all of your favorite clothes.
Make sure your car has gas. Another one of those better safe than sorry tips. This list is pretty much an exposé of all of the dumb things I did when I had a desk job. So many Monday mornings I find myself in a car that’s on E and rushing to the gas station, already late to work. Give yourself at least a fighting chance and make sure you have a half a tank or more.
Pack your bags for the next day. If you have plans to go to the gym, pack that bag the night before and put it by the door. Any lofty goals current you has will be immediately forgotten by future you if you don’t make it as easy as possible.
Have an idea of what you want to wear in mind or picked out Sunday night. That way you’ll look your best and start the week feeling great.
Charge all of your electronics. If you have a fitbit or Apple watch, make sure your devices are charged to kick the week of on the right foot (literally).
Map out the week ahead so you have a sense of where you need to be and what you need to do. Have a lot of meetings on Tuesday? Push preparing for that big presentation to Wednesday so you won’t be interrupted by meetings.
Get to bed early. Turn off Netflix before eleven and you’ll be bright-eyed the next morning.
Drink a lot of water Monday morning. I mean, drink a lot of water period, but especially Monday morning. But you knew that, right?
What are some of the ways you prepare to have a very productive week?